For the last 6 years, I've existed on my own, hauling off to work in the city, running my errands & returning to an empty apt. every night. But last month, I finally left the metro area & moved to more rural environs. Now I live in a much smaller "city" & dwell in an actual house on a residential street. Thankfully, for the most part, things here are familiar to me. My housemate (who I've known for 12 years), grew up in this area, so I've spent quite a bit of time in these parts. Relocating seemed like the obvious choice once the opportunity presented itself.
But I've been in transition since November... and I'm tired!
Needless to say, my faith has suffered some. Part of me, at times, just doesn't care about obligations like Mass or confession. And honestly, sometimes I feel like I've slipped back into my Protestant ways, asking "Why" I have to do this or go there or leave that other thing behind. I've realized my problem isn't so much how busy or tired I am... Its with my willingness to submit to God. When I stay away from the sacraments I would otherwise receive by fulfilling my obligations, I know I am only wounding myself. I don't think God needs me to be at Mass, but the requirement is there for my own well being. If the Church is my mother, it stands to reason that clinging to her & submitting to her can only bring me good... She leads me to her Son, Jesus Christ, in the Body of Christ gathered & in the Eucharist. She magnifies God & sends me off filled with the Holy Spirit. And yet I stay away & try to foster faith on my own. But Catholicism is community... *Throws fit*
I've visited 2 of the 3 Catholic churches in this area over the past year... And I'm going to have to choose one of them to be my new home. It feels a little discouraging. I'm going to have to meet new people & put out extra energy to get involved. Its not exactly my strong suit...