Friday, May 4, 2012

Prayer: Learning To Wait

Lastnight at Mystagogy, Father asked a simple question- how do we pray & why? It seems so simple until one actually begins to think about it. We talked about the common forms- on our knees, talking, singing or quietly in our heads... We talked about the why- to be in relationship with God, to ask for something, to express thanks or sorrow... Father reminded us that God already knows what we need, so prayer, in many ways, is more for us than for God. That said, the Our Father is a perfect prayer. By it, we acknowledge God's sovereignty & will. We ask not for what we want, but what we need: our daily bread, forgiveness of sins & the power to stand up under temptation. When we ask Him to forgive us as we forgive others, we engage in a practice that ideally changes us. God already knows our hearts & if we do it right, we'll get to know ourselves better as we strive to know God. I never thought of it that way. This led to a short discussion on contemplative prayer & the distribution of a rosary.

The crucifix of the rosary I purchased at the beginning of RCIA has begun to turn green... the chords are getting frayed & the varnish on the beads is wearing thin. I've finally memorized nearly everything but the last couple prayers. Good for me. But what have I gotten to know about myself in that time? What have I learned about God?

I've learned that I'm often in too much of a hurry. Its hard for me to be patient & I always seem to be getting ahead of myself.  Father said we can't look forward to see our purpose. We have to look behind us to discern the pattern. That involves slowing down, even stopping to take inventory so we know how to move forward. As to God, I've learned that He really is in control, even when circumstances don't seem to add up. I've felt aimless much of my life. But in looking back, I can start to see the pattern emerge... Its no mistake that I'm a Catholic! My next step awaits, even as I learn to wait on God... 

1 comment:

  1. Smiling... Watching you bloom!